My heart stopped

I was IM ing with Tim in Iraq and he says "I just heard gunfire". Now he is on base in his tent so it is supposed to be pretty safe. So I say "thats not good" I mean there shouldn't be gunfire in the "safe" area right. He says "not at all" then he is offline suddenly. My heart stopped!! I'm thinking holy shit something bad is going down right now. So I spend the next two hours trying not to freak out. Until I finally get a message on my cell that the internet went down for a little while. Thank God! So I get back on line and find out the gun fire wasn't even close to him and I'm worrying my ass off for nothing! Sometimes I think I would really rather not know some things, like when he hears far off gunfire or maybe he could be a little more specific, so as not to give me a heart attack or a panic attack. I guess this is just the stressful shit that goes with this life.

my head is spinning

So my husband left a little over a month ago for Iraq. In the whirlwind of getting ready for him to leave we had visitors galore and a million and one things we needed to get done, not half of which we got done.

We send him off on his flight I get home and my whole house is a disaster area, my children are emotional and explosive, my back yard is filled with tree branches, and there is a swing set that's usable but not completed.

Everyday I tackle what I can and now the tree branches are gone, my kids are calming down, my house is still a mess, and every night I lay down to sleep and my head is spinning from all that needs to be done, all that I did do, worry for him, and loneliness. Oh how I miss him when I lie alone in our huge empty bed and wonder where he is right now.